Thursday, June 3, 2010


As promised, here is my All Dialogue scene. I wrote this about two years ago as a stand-alone vignette for my character Nis'ku. I would set up the scene, but that would defeat the purpose of posting it. I want to see what people think is going on and what history these two characters have. This is one of my favorite things that I've written, and I did most of it on the bus on the way home from work. On a napkin. (and it's unedited, if you're wondering about punctuation)

Hello, James...


Don't Call me that

Still so angry?

You're an asshole

Nice to know you still care; what is that, iced tea?

Yep; my break

Be my guest

god, James, you're not still drinking, are you?

And you're not...

I've been on the program ever since you...left

I didn't leave you, Nish...ka; dammit, would you stop looking at me like that?

Like what?

Like you want to kill me...

You did leave me James, you left me the second you walked into that bar!

Would you keep your fucking voice down?

Your turn

Where are you going?

To get a drink

But you already have - hey, what is that, scotch?


But you don't drink whiskey

I do now

Thought you were on the program?

Do you have any idea what day it is?

Yeahh, it's June- shit, it's our aniversary, isn't it?

You're so full of yourself

Nis'ku, you've got to stop this, you remember last time...

There's no way I can forget that James, believe me, I've tried

That was cold

Are you going to play or not?


So...where is she?


Paris Hilton

Lay off Nis'ku, she's not that bad...

How old is she, twelve? Couldn't go out on a school night, could she?

She's twenty-two Nis'ku, and going to University

Funny, I didn't know you needed a degree for prostitution these days

Alright that's enough; you want to attack me that's fine, but leave her out of this. Are you always this hostile now?

I save it all for you, James

So...did you bring her?

Ohh yeah, I just left her out in the car with the window rolled down


Well what did you expect, dumbass? Of course I didn't bring a baby all this way. She's staying with a friend for the weekend.

When can I see her?

On her eighteenth birthday

Now you know that's not fair...

No, what's not fair is you proposing to me and then going out and-

I think we've covered that...

I hope you don't think I've ruled out homicide by now

See, there's that sense of humor I missed


So did you find anyone else yet, or...

Ohh wow! That's none of your business!

Just thought I'd ask

You know, maybe this wasn't such a good idea...

I wanted to see you

That's why it's not a good idea

No, what's not a good idea is you downing your second whiskey in half an hour

I'll say confession in the morning

You're really leaving? We haven't finished the gam-

Eight ball, corner pocket


I should go

Where are you staying?

Why, you want to tuck me in?

I might be persuaded...


Had to try

I shouldn't have come

I'm glad you came

I'll...I'll call you when I get back

I still want to see her

I'll think about it

I may yet salvage parts of it, though I've decided to nix the James character in the novel. At least for now. There's to much going on already for her with Stephen and Rory. And even their involvement is in a state of flux. All that previous plotting I did in the first few entries? I'm changing a lot of it now. But a lot of it will stay the same too.

More to come!

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